This post will be featured in the soon-to-be-released book series: On My Post: Recollections of a Social Media Maverick: VOLUME II – coming soon to an Amazon store near you!
SHE SAID…
When I reflect on the early part of our relationship, sometimes I wish I was still that pretty young thing smitten by a handsome young man. That moment in time was so different! The flirting, phone calls, notes and poems were always flowing! In hindsight, I didn’t have as many cares in the world. Not as many things pulling on my time and my energy. We could stay up for HOURS on the phone or hang out late like it was nothing! These days, my kids’ bedtime of 9pm doesn’t sound like a bad idea for ME. There was a heightened anticipation of seeing each other again on our next date. As I looked at my future husband, I had more appreciation for how God created him and his potential for greatness. As a couple, we seemed to be at a slower, easier pace. We really took the time to enjoy life and enjoy our togetherness.
Unfortunately, the way we were then is NOT how we are now. Don’t get me wrong — the love is still there! It has just matured and aged with jobs, mortgages, bills, children, ministry, etc. It’s a “GROWN” love that is more aware, more conscious of what we desire to accomplish in this life. Everything we wish to achieve requires our time and energy. At times, this leaves us completed tapped for anything to nourish and cultivate our relationship. In order for my husband and I to secure that all important “couple-time”, we have to intentionally schedule blocks of time to just be together without the world pulling on us. I have to remind myself that our purpose in life as a married couple cannot overshadow the love that God has placed in us for each other. It is out of that love that our Kingdom purpose as one flesh was birthed. So the love MUST be nourished. Our first ministry should always be our marriage.
HE SAID…
Sometimes I look back over the story of us (my wife and I) and remember how I was when we first started dating relative to how I am now… and a part of me wishes I was that guy again. His track record then is SUPERIOR to my own now.
Then I remember that if I was that guy again, I couldn’t be her husband. I couldn’t be the father of our children. I couldn’t be in ministry with her together. I wouldn’t know the importance of seeking wisdom on the other side of my mistakes for OUR sake…and I wouldn’t be as able, willing and aware of how to repent and improve myself for my family and my Father in heaven.
In essence, who my wife is married to today is a stranger relative to the person who proposed to her on April 25th, 2002. This is one of the great mysteries of marriage that develops a bond that no man can truly tear asunder. The reason being that as my renewed mind no longer conforms to this world (see Romans 12:2), as I continue to die daily and pass away to the old me (see 1 Corinthians 15:31); I make room for the new creature that God promised I would become (see 2 Corinthians 5:17). A creature that is not who I was BEFORE I met my wife but one that came into being when she and I became one flesh. One flesh that consists of her needs over and alongside my own. One flesh that is, in fact, an ever-evolving stranger in my house.
STAY TUNED FOR PART TWO: FALLING IN LOVE WITH A COMPLETE STRANGER
